Blog
Articles on relationships, family and wellbeing.
Understanding the impact of Trauma and Childhood Messages in Relationships
Couples can get caught up in reactions because of tone of voice which escilates their conflict. One doesn’t feel heard or validated while the other feels dismissed. Why does this happen? Trauma responses can leave a person tone sensitive and body language sensitive. Internal childhood messages run a...
Conflict in Relationships
There are a number of reasons why a man responds to his wife when she tries to express her feelings. These reasons can be emotional, psychological or situational. 1. Fear of criticism/judgement. A low self image may cause him to become protective of himself. 2. He may feel vulnerable or inadequate b...
Why do couples bring up the past?
Sometimes the past can be about insecurities needing to be resolved. However, sometimes it also be about shaming the other person about past grievances. This will push your partner away and keep you living in the past. For a relationship to grow stronger, validation and forgiveness have to be part o...
Why do some people attract gaslighting?
Some people need to be in a relationship to feel loved. They can’t be on their own. They’re in love with the idea of love. For this reason they overlook unhealthy signs in relationships. They don’t recognise emotional abuse for what it is. Often these people are empaths who have poor boundaries and...
Relationship Savings Account
Just like a bank account, you need to deposit more than you withdraw to pay the bills. In your relationship there needs to be deposits made every day so the relationship will hold up against the hard times. Deposits are affection, physical and emotional connection, respect, kindness, empathy, listen...
Communication in Relationships
Communication isn’t just about verbal communication. It is also verbal, physical and body language. If one person does not feel emotionally safe to communicate because of being dismissed, shutdown, talked over, feelings not validated or their feelings used against them, or being shouted and screamed...
Romance in Relationships
When a couple are going through a relationship breakdown, the most common issues will be communication breakdown and conflict. The next most common issue will be a lack of quality time, date nights, and intimacy. A woman gets tired of being the only one initiating date nights and a man gets tired of...
Do We Need Relationship Counselling?
Does it feel like you and your partner just can’t get along? Does it feel like there is more conflict then there is peace in the house? Because of conflict, have you stopped communicating with each other? Has conflict affected your emotional and physical intimacy? Do you find yourself only focusing...
PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) in Relationships
PTSD is the brain’s response to domestic violence and trauma. Most people have heard of PTSD but the “Fawn” response is not often mentioned. The fawn response is also part of PTSD as a trauma response. PTSD describes the brains response of Freeze, Fight and Flight but now Fawn is also included. The...
Relationships are about connection
This means two people in the relationship need to connect on an emotional level. When there is only one person showing vulnerability or needing emotional support, this can leave that person feeling alone. They feel unsupported and even abandoned in their pain. When both people can express vulnerabil...
Conflict in Relationships
Generally speaking, men and women are wired differently. Men are wired to be solution focused, to think practically, while women are wired emotionally. What this means is, for a woman it is about how a conversation makes her feel, how tone of voice makes her feel, how body language and facial expres...
Conditional Love/Unconditional Love
How do you know if your partner loves conditionally? Conditional love makes you feel Unaccepted. Having to always prove you’re good enough. Your partner keeps moving the goal post of the relationship. Your partner makes you feel you’re not worthy to be loved. You don’t feel listened to because you a...