Narcissistic Abuse in Relationships

Why does a person stay in a Narcissistic abusive relationship?

A person does not realise their relationship is abusive when there is no physical abuse.

When their partner mixes up the abuse with love bombing, then abuse and repeats the cycle, it throws the other person off center.

They think the abuse is their fault because this is what they are consistantly told.

They think back to the beginning of the relationship during the love bombing phase. This may have occurred for the 1st few mths or even years.

This person was never real.

Because of the inconsistancies in the relationship, the other person thinks their partner still loves them and makes excuses or justifies away the red flags of abuse, (maybe not recognizing the behaviour as abuse if it isn’t physical), or they may blame themselves.

They think “I shouldn’t have said that.”

Or “If I didn’t do that he wouldn’t be angry or yelled at me or sworn at me or thrown that at me or slammed that door or punched that wall.” (Coercive abuse.)

Narcissistic abuse goes through a cycle of abuse, being ‘nice’, apologetic, showering with gifts etc, (love bombing stage again) to win back the partner then repeats the cycle.

This keeps the other person holding on.

When things are “good”, the partner thinks “Oh, maybe things are not as bad as I thought.”, “I’m just over reacting.”

Until the abuse comes around again and they’re walking on egg shells.

When the partner is being treated well, they think things are improving and they begin to see a future with their abuser.

If their partner abused them 100% of the time, they may begin to recognise they are being abused, however, when the abuse and control are intermittent, they are not seeing the abuse for what it is.

If you or someone you know are in this type of relationship, do not hesitate to click on the link below for a booking today.