What is your overview of your relationship?

Do you see your partner in a positive or negative light?

Do you respond positively or negatively to your partner when they ask you to do something?

What about building a culture of appreciation? It’s the tiny thank you’s for little things that bring you closer.

You need to deposit more positives than negatives into the relationship especially during conflict.

Do you see your partner as a friend or an ally, even if they’re annoying? So if they’re grumpy in the morning you can give them the benefit of the doubt that they’re going through something so you “cut them some slack.”

But what if you viewed your partner negatively and they asked you to make them a hot drink you might respond with “You have two legs, get it yourself!! What am I…… your slave!!”

This comes from a poor relationship and poor emotional connection with little to no friendship connection.

When you have a positive connection with your partner you can express your needs to them in a positive way for e.g. “Im worried about the bills not being paid this month”, rather than “You promised to pay the bills and you still haven’t done it!! Youre so lazy!!”

By expressing your concerns and making it about you, you are not making your partner the issue, but rather the fact the bill hasn’t been paid.

When couples have a strong friendship, they can discuss issues without criticism, putdowns, name calling etc.

Couples who feel emotionally safe can own their behaviours and endeavour to do better for their partner.

If you would like to work better as a couple, click on the link below for a booking.