What Destroys Intimacy?

Criticism, contempt, nagging, bullying, “mothering”, stonewalling, blaming, deflecting, name calling, yelling, any form of abuse or disrespect, put downs and deceit as well as addictions all destroy the emotional connection between a couple.

If one person in the relationship does not feel emotionally safe to go to their partner for affection, or to confide in them, this will cause an emotional and physical rift in the relationship.

To repair intimacy, each person in the relationship needs to feel heard and their feelings validated.

Men and women are wired differently.
A woman needs that emotional connection of gently being held, the hand holding when out with her partner and affection that she knows isn’t about putting pressure on her for sex later on. She needs to know her partner wants to be affectionate with her purely because he loves her and wants to spend time with her.

Men need validation for what they do around the home, as an income earner as well as a parent and partner and the same for the woman.
Respect is very important to both people in the relationship.

Generally when there is a disconnection in the relationship, the man doesn’t understand why the woman is turning down physical intimacy in the bedroom.
A woman needs a genuine emotional connection with her partner to want that physical connection in the bedroom. Without the emotional connection she feels “used” in the bedroom.